I know that being a mother is full of challenges. Full of second guessing. Wondering what you did wrong. When any of my kids have struggles or suffers disappointment I feel so bad. I want to make it all better.
When the kids were small, I could give a hug to a sad child and a kiss to any "boo boos" and make it all better.
My daughter wrote this a while ago. It was written in either 2001 or 2002. Not sure which diagnosis I had, I have had so many in my life.
I remember questioning my parents and wondering why they did this or that. Didn't they want to know the right way? I felt at times that I had superior understanding of their situation and they were just ignorant.
As they are growing up, there have been times when my own kids have told me how wrong I am. What I could do better. How to do better. This is, I guess, a part of becoming a mature adult.
A parent's hope is that their children will start to appreciate them while they are still alive. I know that they all love me (and their dad). I know someday- hopefully not for a long time- they will miss us when we are gone. I hope that if I have grandchildren one day they hear stories about how silly their grandparents were, not how mean or stupid.
Everyone needs to be appreciated. My daughter's writing here makes me feel that way.